The Story Behind Tight Times
When my eldest daughter, Thea, was then four years old and in pre-school, I picked her up from school one day with a report from her teacher that she got into a fight with a classmate.
Apparently, her classmate had been asking her how many cars we have and bragged about how many cars they had. Thea said we had one car, and the classmate said, “Whaaaattt? You have only ONE car? We have five cars. You must be poor.”
At that time, Thea had no understanding of the concept of “poor”, but the way the classmate said it must have gotten to her. “No, we’re not!” she retorted back.
And the classmate said, “Yes you are!”
“Not!”
“You are, too!”
It went on and on that way until they got into a shouting match and Thea cried as her classmates ganged up on her. The teacher soon broke it up and discussed what happened with the group.
She told me she was hard put on how to explain “poor” to the children, and focused on discussing with them about good manners and not shouting at others.
After we got home, I asked Thea for her side of the story and she basically confirmed the details as they transpired. Then, she asked me too, “What is poor, Mama?”
I was struggling to explain, too, and told her that a lot of people think that when you have less things than they have then you are poor and they are rich. I also reminded her of the street kids we see around, who rummage for food in garbage cans and sleep on the streets, and explained that from where we are, then the street kids are poorer. Then, I reminded her of our blessings—of our good health, our good food, the toys she has, the love we feel for each other, our home, her cousins and her friends, the gifts she gets on her birthday and on Christmas… and her eyes started lighting up, like she finally got it.
"So ‘poor’ is when you have no home and nobody loves you, Mama?"
I was struck by her answer and it took a while for me to say, “That’s right, palangga (beloved). You got it right!”
Five years later, when I left their father and took her and her siblings along with me, and we were experiencing difficult times, this line from her sustained me even as I struggled creating a home environment for them that was healthy and happy and affirming, despite the severe lack of material resources.
There were times when-- three or four days before payday-- my money would run out although we had food stocked at home. If we went to school, I barely had enough for our transportation, much less for--our snacks and lunch at school. So, I decided we’d just entirely absent ourselves from school (I worked in the same school they studied in).
I encouraged in our home the habit of gratitude and generosity, even despite one’s own material lack. The first purpose was just to keep from feeling down and despairing (which was really more for me than for them, as they seemed unaffected by it. They thought it was cool that we had extra days off just to relax and have fun at home!).
Later on, as I read about The Law of Attraction and the power of gratitude to raise one’s vibrations and attract the good things in life, as well as even learned about the results of gratitude research in academic psychological circles and the principles of quantum physics in creating so-called “realities” through thought energies-- I felt further affirmed in the path I have cleared for my children and I.
All these inspired Tight Times, and I have tried to show in the story all these principles at work.
